Now, I’m certainly not suggesting that this teacher be let off scott free, though no amount of punishment short of being tried in court is likely to be as effective as the sheer embarrassment she’s probably already experiencing. However, I do understand the desire of the parents involved to get some sort of retribution. The question then is, what’s appropriate? Does she really deserve to be taken to court and slapped with a potential sex offender tag for what seems to have been just an admittedly large lapse in intelligence?

I’d like to think that if it was my kid in that class, I’d be able to approach the situation with some level of understanding and even compassion towards the teacher. What’s done in someone else’s bedroom isn’t any of my concern, so if the kindergarten teacher down the street likes to get all freaky in their Dungeon O’ Love, so be it. As long as they’re effective and competent in the classroom, then his or her subscription to Ball Gags Monthly is pretty much irrelevant. If that info does manage to slip out into the public ether through accidental means, then why should I hold it against them?

So, back to this particular faux pas. Assuming it’s just a 6 second clip of your standard, run-of-the-mill sex tape (and at this point, there’s nothing to indicate otherwise), I’d vote for letting her off with a warning to better vet her video projects before presenting them to impressionable 10-11 year olds. As for the parents who’s kids saw the clip, well, get over it. At that age, it’s about time to have The Talk with them anyhow, so look at this as the perfect segue into what’s not exactly a comfortable topic in the first place! No matter what, try to keep your heads on straight and remember that there are far, far worse things in the world that your kids are likely exposed to on a daily basis than a few seconds of home-taped intercourse.

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In 2007, four University of Pennsylvania School of Medicine doctors who specialize in gastroenterology and radiology conducted an experiment on the stomach activities of a competitive eater and an average eater.

The average eater ate seven hot dogs before he felt sick. Champion speed eater Tim Janus ate 36 hot dogs in 10 minutes before doctors intervened.

Janus, a trim 29-year-old at the time, insisted that he did not feel full. Through training and competing, he no longer felt full regardless of how much he ate. His stomach did not have muscle contractions called peristalsis, which move the food down the digestive tract.

Instead, the hot dogs sat in his stomach and “protruded enough to create the distinct impression of a developing intrauterine pregnancy,” the doctors wrote.

Blurgh.

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Enter Huw Gwilliam, a graphic designer from the UK who struck gold with his idea to take classic rock and roll album covers and re-imagine them as vintage Pelican books. There’s not a single one that doesn’t look great, but as people who know me know, it should come as no surprise that the Licensed To Ill cover is my hands down favorite. If I had both the time and inclination to rip off his idea, I’d probably do up the entire Beasties catalog in a similar fashion, before moving on to Public Enemy and The Clash…

[via]

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See, people who play with Neopets tend to be young children, 90% of which are in the elementary school range. They collect, trade and earn points with which to “buy” rare items and articles of interest with which to gussy up, feed or otherwise care for their Neopets.

Apparently, scammers have discovered that there’s a lot of value phishing on Neopets sites and forums, offering items such as magical paintbrushes – a hot commodity – and other hot items in order to get the kids to click on external links and unknowingly download trojan horses. As you can imagine, this can lead not only to kids losing their Neopets points, but to their parents possibly having their credit card info, bank account numbers, etc. totally jacked.

Wave goodbye to your rare items, kids – and you didn’t want your XBox Live account (that potentially has credit card details attached to it) anymore either, did you? The attackers then use the familiar tactic of taking a previously trusted source and using it to attack their friends & other newcomers to the site. Alongside hanging out in the handily labeled “Newbies” section and spamming messages, they’ll also post fake “It worked” messages from compromised accounts to the forums of threads started by the attacker, much like people do on Youtube to give the impression that fake programs actually work (scroll down to “positive comments”).

And the evil doesn’t stop there! According to the first comment at the post I linked to earlier, there’s a World of Warcraft-like after market for leveled-up Neopets and points, so the kids that fall for these scams might not only lose some of their points, but could potentially lose their beloved Neopets as well. The thief might then turn around and sell the innocent cyber-creature on another site, rendering it lost to the original owner forever. It’s like a Lifetime movie of the week, but starring weird little mash-up critters instead of Meredith Baxter Birney and underwritten by a multitude of parents’ financial information.

[via]

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Complete press release after the jump…

‘G.I. Joe: The Rise Of Cobra’ Advances On 7-Eleven® Stores
Retailer Takes Aim at G.I. JOE Fans with Liquid Artillery Slurpee®, ‘GO JOE’ Energy Cappuccino and Sweepstakes

DALLAS (June 30, 2009) – 7-Eleven, Inc. reports for duty this July as it joins forces with Paramount Pictures to promote the Aug. 7 release of the new action movie, “G.I. Joe: The Rise of Cobra.”

At the center of the promotion, starting Wednesday, is a new G.I. JOE-themed true-blue Slurpee® flavor – Liquid Artillery, a summer fruit blend of strawberry, pineapple and lime flavors created by The Coca-Cola Company. Four 22-oz. collectible Slurpee cups with matching character straws feature G.I. JOE team members CONRAD DUKE HOWSER and SNAKE EYES, and COBRA members, BARONESS and STORM SHADOW. An online Slurpee Nation sweepstakes offers a grand-prize trip for two to attend the Los Angeles premiere of the movie.

Besides its frozen blue Slurpee drink, 7-Eleven has added a hot beverage tie-in with a ‘GO JOE’ Cappuccino, mocha-flavored with three natural energy ingredients – taurine, guarana and caffeine. One 12-ounce cup has as much caffeine as an 8-ounce energy drink. Refillable silver and black16-ounce coffee mugs featuring the G.I. JOE logo also are available while supplies last.

“G.I. JOE is probably the best-known boy’s toy in the world,” said Jay Wilkins, 7-Eleven brand manager for cold beverages. “The movie has a ready-made audience of boys and men who played with G.I. JOE, and we want to bring back some of those great childhood memories by promoting ‘G. I. Joe: The Rise of Cobra’ with a great, new Slurpee drink, fun cups and straws.”

“This program brings the excitement of the new movie right inside 7-Eleven stores,” commented LeeAnne Stables, executive vice president of worldwide marketing partnerships at Paramount Pictures. “Fans will get an early taste of this big screen update of their favorite characters from this incredible action-packed ‘G.I. Joe: The Rise of Cobra’ film.”

In addition to the four plastic 3D cups, 7-Eleven has created two paper Slurpee cups with movie graphics along with Slurpee Nation reward codes that can be used to enter an online instant-win sweepstakes at www.slurpee.com.

Prizes awarded in the month-long sweepstakes include Xbox 360 Entertainment Systems, G.I. JOE Xbox 360 videogames, Xbox LIVE Gold subscriptions and one-year subscriptions to Symantec’s Norton Antivirus and spyware removal program. The sweepstakes for the trip to the Los Angeles movie premiere ends July 20.

Introduced in the United States by Hasbro in 1964, G.I. JOE celebrates its 45-year anniversary this year as the world’s first “action figure.” As enemies, military uniforms and gear changed, the toy line evolved over the years. “G.I. Joe: The Rise of Cobra” is a live-action film adaptation based on the 1980s version of the franchise, which set up the conflict between G.I. JOE and COBRA and introduced audiences to characters, like SNAKE EYES, BARONESS and STORM SHADOW.

Directed by Stephen Sommers (“The Mummy”), the cast of “G.I. Joe: The Rise of Cobra” includes Sienna Miller, Channing Tatum, Marlon Wayons and Dennis Quaid. Set 10 years in the future, the film shows the rise of the COBRA organization and focuses on the creation of an international force of operatives who use high-tech equipment to battle their enemies.

Besides the online sweepstakes and in-store signage, cups and collectibles, 7-Eleven will run radio advertising promoting the “G.I. Joe: The Rise of Cobra” campaign in select markets. Assisting 7-Eleven in developing the partnerships and promotions for the G.I. JOE program is FreshWorks, 7-Eleven, Inc.’s advertising and marketing agency, which is a consortium of Omnicom companies.

About 7 Eleven, Inc.
7 Eleven, Inc. is the premier name and largest chain in the convenience retailing industry. Based in Dallas, Texas, 7-Eleven operates, franchises or licenses approximately 7,800 7-Eleven® stores in North America. Globally, 7-Eleven operates, franchises or licenses more than 36,200 stores in 15 countries. During 2008, 7-Eleven stores worldwide generated total sales of more than $53.7 billion. For 15 consecutive years 7-Eleven has been listed among Hispanic Magazine’s Hispanic Corporate Top 100 Companies that provide the most opportunities to Hispanics. 7-Eleven is franchising its stores in the U.S., and is expanding through organic growth, acquisitions, and its Business Conversion Program. Find out more online at www.7-Eleven.com.

About “G.I. Joe: The Rise of Cobra”
Paramount Pictures and Spyglass Entertainment Present, In Association With Hasbro, A di Bonaventura Pictures Production of A Stephen Sommers Film: “G.I. JOE: The Rise of Cobra” starring Adewale Akinnuoye-Agbaje, Christopher Eccleston, Joseph Gordon-Levitt, Byung Hun Lee, Sienna Miller, Rachel Nichols, Ray Park, Jonathan Pryce, Saïd Taghmaoui, Channing Tatum, Marlon Wayans and Dennis Quaid. The film is directed by Stephen Sommers. The story is by Michael B. Gordon and Stuart Beattie & Stephen Sommers. The screenplay is by Stuart Beattie and David Elliot & Paul Lovett. Based on Hasbro’s G.I. JOE® Characters. The film is produced by Lorenzo di Bonaventura, Brian Goldner and Bob Ducsay. The executive producers are Stephen Sommers, David Womark, Gary Barber, Roger Birnbaum and Erik Howsam. The director of photography is Mitchell Amundsen. The production designer is Ed Verreaux. The film editors are Bob Ducsay and Jim May. The costume designer is Ellen Mirojnick. The music is composed and conducted by Alan Silvestri. This film has not yet been rated.

About Hasbro
Hasbro, Inc. (NYSE:HAS) is a worldwide leader in children’s and family leisure time products and services with a rich portfolio of brands and entertainment properties that provides some of the highest quality and most recognizable play and recreational experiences in the world. As a brand-driven, consumer-focused global company, Hasbro brings to market a range of toys, games and licensed products, from traditional to high-tech and digital, under such powerful brand names as TRANSFORMERS, PLAYSKOOL, TONKA, MILTON BRADLEY, PARKER BROTHERS, CRANIUM and WIZARDS OF THE COAST. Come see how we inspire play through our brands at http://www.hasbro.com . (C) 2009 Hasbro, Inc. All Rights Reserved.

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Even better, the guy didn’t just throw up the final piece in a few different poses, though those pics are part of the appeal. No, he walks you through a step by step “Making Of…” presentation, starting with the first flat piece of metal with a few circles sketched out on it, to the machining of the parts, to the painting to the final piece. Of course, it’s in Russian, so you’ll have to either speak the language or have faith in an internet translator site in order to do more than drop your jaw in awe at the pictures.

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